I’m almost done with another round of revision. As always,
I’m amazed by how much depth and clarity can be added to a story by changing
a single word, or tweaking a phrase or comparison.
It’s kind of like this vintage turquoise bucket thingy
with holes in it.
From that description do you know what it is? Or even from
looking at it? Maybe, you do at a basic
level but more likely not.
Let me add a bit more description and a comparison.
Here’s a vintage wooden bucket basket which goes with this metal contraption
and rope.
Yeah, I know your getting the idea. But I’m not done yet.
Sometimes describing an object from a different angle will help with clarity. Sometimes, not.
Here is a wooden thingy with a boatload of holes in it.
Hmm. Maybe it is something that belongs on a boat? Maybe it’s a piece of trash.
But find the perfect angle and words to describe it and
you have clarity and depth.
Tilt the basket and the contents are revealed. Clothespins.
This vintage turquoise bucket like thingy with holes is
actually a depression era clothespin basket with drain holes--pretty
obvious, once the right description, perspective and comparison are found. The metal contraption is a clothesline reel with clothesline.
I should add as a side note that, last night, the scene I was working on called for a certain lack of clarity, for the sake of pace and mystery.
How about you? Found any mysterious objects lately or
tweaked any details in your story and had it make all the difference?
